Whatever does not
pretend at all has style enough. Booth Tarkington;
‘The Magnificent Ambersons’
Most people as it turns out, approach style from a
very visual perspective – and who can blame them, it has to be seen to be
appreciated. But it is much more and deeper than that. Have you ever been
stopped in your tracks by a gloriously beautiful sunset or an elegantly dressed
person oozing effortless charm? Both spark your wonder and instantly lift your
worries and troubles, if only for a brief moment. Now that is style - an innate pull, a silent nod of acknowledgement
that makes you pause in the midst of whatever you are doing or thinking. It’s a
connection that stirs something deep within you. And that style may very well be
emanated by a person, a building, a room, art or indeed nature.
So knowing style does not merely involve seeing it,
but rather feeling its presence. Style, as such, never shouts for attention; it
is not pretentious like that and the styles that do shout for attention are
trying too hard – bordering on vulgarity posing as style. True style grabs your
attention in just being. That is the big distinction and the ultimate guide to style:
It is an existence worthy of note, in a
person or in your surroundings.
They say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and
the very same is true of style. What I might perceive and call stylish, you may
think (at best) non-descript or (at worst) hideous. There are really no definitive
criteria or standards of "style". Because it is synonymous with the feelings
it evokes in us - each and every one of us is right about what we think as
stylish, as bizarre as this may seem. And the beacon of finding our personal style
is delving deep within ourselves and recognising our inner feelings. Any sense
of wonder, serenity or exhilaration is a mark of its acknowledgement and
existence. It is truly an emotional connection that involves being utterly selfish
and surrounding ourselves with the things we feel good about and putting on
things we feel good in.
Stylists and magazines articles will often tell you
the ‘rules’ of mixing and matching and what you should wear for different
body-shapes and dos and don’ts of
decorating your homes. I would take everything they say with a pinch of salt
and throw that salt over my shoulder – because it is certainly not a formula -otherwise
we would all be stylish. The requisites of style do not follow a conventional line
of best fit– and even if it did, it would be full of outliers to the
exasperation of all statisticians. There is no universal list of stipulations
when it comes to style and each one of us needs to create their own list from
scratch. This very attribute of style actually contributes to its elusiveness
and mystique.
Another biggest misconception and style faux-pas
where most people go wrong is in defining and adopting style as the current
trends in fashion. What's "in" is stylish and what was last season is
"out" and not in style. That also is rather a shallow and an
uninformed way of thinking and talking about style.
In reality, style is timeless, transcends current
fashion and is a way of living and thinking that is unique to each and every one
of us. It is an approach to design and fashion and our preference for certain
designs over others. Consequently people who copy and paste fashion from the
catwalks and designer magazines are never ever stylish. They are poor imitators
miss the chance of being their best. If you look at nature, it never imitates,
each sunset is different and each snowflake is unique. Nothing knows how to
rock style better than nature.
Undoubtedly most of us are influenced by current
trends, but they do not become "style" unless adopted by us. When
design and fashion enters the domain of our personal space only then it becomes
our style. On the shelf or in stores they are just innumerable design ideas
waiting to be incorporated by people into their wardrobes and spaces.
Most people instinctively have a style, whether
they are aware of it or not. A list of design preferences that they gravitate
towards time and again without realising - reaching for the same or
similar things in home decor and personal attire.
And like any and many of life’s journeys, our style
evolves as we grow older and more mature. I myself, over the years have
experimented with design and fashion but as I have grown older I have become
more confident in knowing and recognising my personal style and picking out
what in the current trends would complement me and my personal spaces. But the
beauty of style is in fluidity, it is ever evolving, ever changing and never
ever stagnant. That is what gives it its distinctiveness and newness at any
stage in your life. You will know you have nailed it when you feel confident
and happy in its presence, whether it is on you or around you.
So the age old question, who has style and who
hasn't? Well I leave that question for you to ponder over. Is there a right or
wrong - but more importantly, is there a right and wrong that you and I will agree
on? Because when it comes to style, it really is all about our keenest perceptions
and what we make of it, like ninety-nine percent of life's encounters.
