I have been thankfuly reminded of something I had fogotten to appreciate of late; the many merits of doing absolutely nothing; and the reminder came from a book I am currently reading "The Architect's Apprentice" by Elif Shafaq.
Although by no means as spell bounding as her other literature, like "40 rules of love" or "Honour"; "The Archietect's Apprentice" still has nuggets of wisdom and deep profound truths woven into its fictionous tale which, if you have read her books, you will come to associate with Elif's writing. The story set in sixteenth century Ottoman Rule in Istanbul gives a good glimpse of both the grandeur and the grim surrounding that era - but also transends from time to time to remind us of some profound universal truth, something that goes straight to the heart and stays there.
And that something, this time, was a brief conversation between the Architect's apprentice and Tomasso (an Italian philosopher and poet of some repute at the time, a real character borrowed from history but ofcourse living a fictionous tale in this story) in which Tomasso poses a question to the apprentice saying "Is it only the things we do that matter? or the ones we don't do that carry weight as well?" - and then goes on to explain to the bewildered apprentice that sometimes not taking any action like not retaliating to a man who curses you on the street, or not taking advantage of a vulnerable women; shows more character, more courage and says much more about the person you are. And his final words to the archietct's apprentice ;
"Remember you not only build with wood, stones and bricks. You build with absence too"
How true!
And now coming back to myself.
I find myself again taking a back seat, abandoning work and looking after the needs of family once again - and I won't lie, I have been guilty of sometimes feeling restless and wondering what I could have achieved if only I had persued a proper career. And there have been times when I have felt really sad too (proper tears in eyes sad) of not achieving anything substantial in life. But this conversation in Elif's book really struck a chord in me - and got me thinking that all those times and all those years when my career took a back seat to the needs of my family - all those years of "not doing anything" I was actually building something; a healthy, well adjusted family.
So this is my message to all women who find themselves in a similar predicament, don't feel you have lost out on building a career by being at home for your loved ones, you actually have built something far more valuable!
Although by no means as spell bounding as her other literature, like "40 rules of love" or "Honour"; "The Archietect's Apprentice" still has nuggets of wisdom and deep profound truths woven into its fictionous tale which, if you have read her books, you will come to associate with Elif's writing. The story set in sixteenth century Ottoman Rule in Istanbul gives a good glimpse of both the grandeur and the grim surrounding that era - but also transends from time to time to remind us of some profound universal truth, something that goes straight to the heart and stays there.
And that something, this time, was a brief conversation between the Architect's apprentice and Tomasso (an Italian philosopher and poet of some repute at the time, a real character borrowed from history but ofcourse living a fictionous tale in this story) in which Tomasso poses a question to the apprentice saying "Is it only the things we do that matter? or the ones we don't do that carry weight as well?" - and then goes on to explain to the bewildered apprentice that sometimes not taking any action like not retaliating to a man who curses you on the street, or not taking advantage of a vulnerable women; shows more character, more courage and says much more about the person you are. And his final words to the archietct's apprentice ;
"Remember you not only build with wood, stones and bricks. You build with absence too"
How true!
And now coming back to myself.
I find myself again taking a back seat, abandoning work and looking after the needs of family once again - and I won't lie, I have been guilty of sometimes feeling restless and wondering what I could have achieved if only I had persued a proper career. And there have been times when I have felt really sad too (proper tears in eyes sad) of not achieving anything substantial in life. But this conversation in Elif's book really struck a chord in me - and got me thinking that all those times and all those years when my career took a back seat to the needs of my family - all those years of "not doing anything" I was actually building something; a healthy, well adjusted family.
So this is my message to all women who find themselves in a similar predicament, don't feel you have lost out on building a career by being at home for your loved ones, you actually have built something far more valuable!
